What's in MY wallet?

So they say you can tell a lot about someone from looking at their wallet. What, no one says that? Well, they should. Because I think what's in my wallet really shows who I am as a person and some interesting stories are tucked in there.
Anyway, here's what's in mine.
In the main part there's...
-an Underground train ticket from Bromley South to London from when I visited the borough with Emily and a friend, strangely enough NOT the friend who actually lives in Bromley.
-a Shell card not under my name I sporadically use for gas
-a Kohl's card under my name I never use for anything
-a library card for the town I live in now I have never used in my life because I already have an overflowing shelf of books I have yet to read.
-the insurance card from my school I probably won't have for much longer because my university increased the price of insurance by leaps and bounds, like jerks.
-my university ID with the picture that was taken on the second day of orientation, after very little sleep and a lot of awkward icebreakers and rain
-a Barnes and Noble card I use often because they keep on sending me coupons
-a bank card I never use
-a different bank card I only got because Bank of America is partners with Barclay's and I could use it in the U.K. and now it's the only one I use.
-a wallet-sized periodic table my Junior year Chemistry teacher gave us because you just never know when you could use a periodic table.
-my Oyster card from London, still facing inside because the picture is truly awful
-a AAA card I have never used in my life because I am a true driving prodigy, obviously.
-a weird medical card with phone numbers to call if I'm hurt, but I have no idea where it came from, which makes it fairly sketchy
-my social security card, which really should not be in my wallet, but there it is
-33 dollars in cash
-a voucher for a dollar off an item from a local used book store
-two different sets of coupons from Cost Cutters, where I recently got a haircut but didn't tip the very nice hair dresser I had
-about a dollar in change
In the license window-
-a slip of paper with my address on it, from when we had recently moved and I didn't know where my house was
-a slip of paper saying 237, from the DH part 1 dvd event, when they were only letting in 250 people. I made it just in time.
-my license, facing inside for obvious reasons.
In the extra, external slots-
-a library card from my hometown that is probably 13 years old
-a Panera card I have never used for reasons unknown to me, because Panera is freaking delicious
-an eye doctor's business card, with my prescription on the back- right: -5.25 left: -6.25
-a fold-up Underground map, that my friends gave me crap for, because it's not an offical Underground pamphlet, even though the actual map of the lines is the same and I really like this one because you can just open it to the little part you need to see, and people don't know you're looking at a map.
-movie tickets from "Bandslam"(my first movie post-move, I thought it was good at the time. Now, not so much), "New Moon" (once again I ask you not to judge me. At least this one was better than "Twilight"), "Iron Man 2" (I saw this during my visit to Minnesota. Thank goodness I used a gift card. I didn't even see the first "Iron Man"), "Letters to Juliet" (LOVED IT), "Toy Story 3" (this ticket cost $9.50. And I went with all of my family. That's almost 40 dollars for a movie. WHAT.), "Eclipse" (you shouldn't even be surprised by this anymore. I went to this at 9:30 the morning it came out), "Inception" (Joseph Gordon Levitt WHAT UP), "Harry Potter DH Part 1"(people complain that this movie was boring, but have they read the book? Yeah, they go camping. Get over it), "Kung Fu Panda 2" (my contact starting acting up during the flashbacks of adorable baby pandas. I was angry), "Bad Teacher" (Justin Timberlake and Jason Segal are in a movie that consists of dirty jokes? I'm so there), "Winnie the Pooh" (I saw it this week with my mom. Despite some of the voices sounding wrong, it was adorable and made both of us nostalgic), "Harry Potter DH Part 2" (words can't express how much I love this movie. I saw it twice in 24 hours.)

So if you ever find a wallet that has all this stuff in it, please return it to me. And don't turn the ID's over. By all means, take my money, just don't turn to over my ID's.